For some parts of us, this can sound straightforward. People ask us all the time, “How are you?” But how often do we pause long enough to check in with ourselves in a way that’s actually useful? This article is about feelings — not as something to get lost in, but as signals worth understanding. … Read more
I was attracted to IFS because it is the kindest, most unshaming therapy modality I have encountered. It opens space for authenticity and greater acceptance and courage because it supports us to notice the positive intentions behind patterns that appear unhelpful even when on the surface they seem only to make us suffer. For my clients, … Read more
Many of my clients have sat in my office and told me “I’m Not an Angry Person”. For my sensitive, introverted clients with lower self‑esteem, the idea of feeling—even worse showing—anger feels like a nerve-wracking ordeal to be avoided at all costs. In reality, though, it is very difficult to avoid ever feeling angry since … Read more
Inspiration for Therapy Work: Alan Downs’ Book “The Velvet Rage” Seen as a Bible for understanding the hurts and challenges of growing up gay, Alan Downs’s, “The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man’s World”, is a deeply insightful and useful book for many of us in the LGBTQIA+ … Read more
Picture the scene: At a recent concert, one member of our group, a man in his 60’s, was trying to find his seat in the row in front of us as he clutched a small bag. The bag had been given to everyone by the organiser of the concert as a free promotional gift. One … Read more
As a member of the LGBTQIA+ community, one of my deepest wishes is to use the skills I’ve learned and honed over my career to promote the health and well-being of others like me. As human beings we all have a need to be seen, listened to and understood by other human beings. We yearn … Read more